The Dream

Everyone has a certain place that brings back the fondest of memories. Perhaps it was a lake, a playground, a bench. All of these places gave you a sense of warmth, a sense that everything was right in the world, or even that magic could happen.

As runners, I think we all have a special place (or even a few) to us that we cherish dearly. For me, that place was Norbuck Park in Dallas. A park filled with memories of trails, tears, and triumph. I can still hear the sound of the gun go off during my middle school years of cross-country. I still remember the old dusty 2-mile course like it was yesterday. The first big turn, the "massive hill" that used to haunt me, the wooded portion of the course, and the extraordinary finish through the tree tunnel.

Beautiful Norbuck Park… photo credited to bigredwill

Often when I am back in Dallas, I'll go run the course just for old-times sake. It was here that my love for running arguably began. Youngsters learned how to compete, how to fight off pain, and how to finish well.

My favourite part of the 2-mile dirt course was the last 300 meters. You would go up a massive hill, come flying down, then wind through a tree tunnel that would lead you to a 300 meter finish. This last section was always special to me. I remember dying in a race, coming down the tree tunnel, and then planting my foot on a root, which signified the final stretch. When I launched from the root, it was time to set ablaze and hammer towards the finish line.

During this moment, the final kick, life seemed to stop. The people around me cheering seemed to disappear, all I could hear was my beating heart ticking and runners next to me breathing deeply as we poured our souls into the finish line with nothing left. I'm thankful for these times that taught me truly how to compete and dig deep!

Lately, running has been quite rough. Injuries keep plaguing me in 2015, so I have spent a lot of time cross-training and Alter-G'ing. Being away from the team is the hardest part. You just want to get back…and soon. I would give anything to be crushing workouts with the guys!

Not everyday is a bad day… having a little fun on the Alter G!

Anyone with an injury understands that there is a sense of longing, sometimes, even sadness. I've gone through major bouts of depression being injured constantly throughout my career.

Deep water running alone often feels like I am stuck in a prison with nowhere to go. 60 minutes can feel like eternity. I can relate to how Paul felt while he was in prison, yet Paul calls us to run the race well (1st Cor 9:24). While I'm in the pool, I like to imagine the story of Paul and Silas singing in prison, how crazy would that of looked like!

But it hasn't been all doom and gloom while I've been injured. The Lord continues to teach me incredible things, and I am thankful for that every single day. God is good, even when I am injured and don't understand. Frankly, I may never understand. But I can glorify God with an injury, that's why I sing, just like Paul and Silas did!

Recently, I've been having a reoccurring dream, back at Norbuck Park. I am racing the old dusty 2-mile course, only this time, in a Baylor jersey by myself. Everything is just like before, each turn I take brings back nostalgia and it is magical. A mile and a half in, however, I begin to feel the pain of racing take its toll. As I feel the pain and my body screams for mercy, I then make the narrow turn approaching the tree tunnel. I launch off the root towards the finish line and begin crafting my final move.

As I shift into my final gear, something incredible happens. The sun comes shining in through the tree tunnel and Jesus is right next to me, encouraging me and saying, "You can do it, trust me, I am with you!"

When I cross the finish line, Jesus embraces me and tells me that He has been with me, every step of the race.

My life verse, Isaiah 41:10, is a testimony to that promise which says,

"So do not fear for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, and help you. I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." 

Even though I am injured, I trust in the Lord and know that He is with me, every single step of the way, just like my dream at Norbuck Park!

...Maybe we will get to race in heaven with healthy and new bodies!

Why Do Runners Race? (and my New Year's Resolution..)

I love watching races because there more that meets the eye than one would expect. Imagine twenty men competing, pouring their soul into 4, 8, or 25 laps of grueling running. I truly believe that these races mean more than men competing. It takes a lot even just to get the privilege to wear a jersey, to be racing in collegiate track and field. There is a tremendous amount of work that goes into running just to simply be on the starting line. Lonely hours are spent on the roads, on the track, in the maintenance room, enduring cold, sweat, pain, or even tears. Perhaps runners who race were injured before, maybe they are struggling to pay their rent, maybe, they are battling addiction. We simply don't know what they have gone through to get to the exact moment in time where their feet, heart, and soul are on the line for the next 15 minutes of their lives.

Feeling the heat of racing during 2014 Texas Relays

Because of all this time, energy, and efforts spent in preparation, runners don't just show up to a race to simply run. There is so much more. A race is in essence an avenue built for men who want to experience something greater than the normalities of life. These runners are soul-searchers, putting everything on the line in the heat of racing.

Spending time spectating this weekend, I could see so many emotions in the competitor's faces. Sometimes it reveals the excitement of a PR, the pangs of a bad race, or simple disappointment or relief after the race ends. What is funny is that even if a guy is in 17th place, he still could have run the race of his life. This is what makes running so happy, seeing people overcome the battle within themselves.

What I have learned is that the physical results however, are insignificant compared to the lessons every runner learns or takes from a race. We go through pain, struggle, joy, and determination with each step we take. It is in these moments we feel the most alive, because every thought is magnified. We enter a world with ourselves, our competitor's, and God himself. A world unknown to most people.

And it is a beautiful thing to watch…

I like to sit in on races and think, what has that guy/girl gone through to get to this exact moment? Or why does he run? What's his purpose for running? What's he going through with every step?

I believe every runner races because he/she is searching for something. Maybe it's a time, an opportunity to better themselves physically. Perhaps a chance to compete, or feel the spirit of competition. Or possibly an opening to search for meaning beyond themselves, to feel something, maybe even God. All of these things seem so readily available when the body has nothing left, when we are broken to the point of exhaustion. We can see it in competitor's faces, the look when they are relying on pure guts or heart to finish a race. That's my favourite moment in the race, because it's a chance to see what someone really has in them, to see every fiber of their being and soul pushing towards the finish line.

In my opinion, the best runners have utilized this search by desiring both victory and meaning behind their races. They push their bodies to physical victory, but look for the meaning in every step, even if the race turns out poorly.

I thought a lot about a resolution for the year 2015. As I prayed and sat in my room, I came across a verse that embodies these thoughts on racing, as well as what I personally strive to accomplish in running.

(Note: I do not solely read the Message translation; however, I really like the way this passage is interpreted)

You've all been to the stadium and seen athletes race. Everyone runs; one wins. Run to win. All athletes train hard. They do it for a gold medal that tarnishes and fades. Your after the one that's gold eternally. I don't know about you, but I'm running hard for the finish line. I'm giving it everything I've got. No sloppy living for me! I'm staying alert and in top condition! I'm not going to get caught napping, telling everyone about it and missing out myself." 1st Corinthians 9:24-27 (MSG)

I want to run fast, but more importantly experience God through running, become closer to Him through it, and make His name more known through my running career.

So thats it. This verse is my resolution. To train, race, and live a life that goes for the gold in everything, to maximize the gifts God has given me. However, I pray that I would recognize that the medal I strive for won't be here on Earth, but when God says, "You have fought the fight, you have finished the race. You have kept the faith… Well done my good and faithful servant!"

And you know what?

I bet Jesus and I go for a run after!

Matt